Woman, why don't you be answering any of my pages?

The Wikipedia Page for the movie Clueless is surprisingly short given its tremendous (and welcome - at least by me and my friends) impact on the lexicon, fashion and zeitgeist of my generation. Is this because of "geek prioritization," a term explaining the preponderance of "long and well-written articles on obscure characters in science fiction/fantasy" and the grievous lack of articles on other things that geeks don't care about? Surely it can't be that the film isn't sufficiently "notable" to merit an extensive article detailing its influences and its impact on contemporary culture (there isn't even a quotes section!). Whatever!

Anyway, one thing Wikipedia (because it is run by geeks) does mention is technology's pervasive presence in the movie. With this in mind, I just re-watched Clueless, noting which technologies Cher and Dionne had access to and which were absent from the movie.


Technologies conspicuous in the film:

• Polaroids (RIP) - Cher uses them because she "doesn't trust mirrors"
• Cordless landlines - Cool then, ugly and depressingly backward now
• Large cell phones - REALLY large, but everyone brought them to the dinner table anyway
• Pagers - Yep
• Starbucks! - It hadn't even opened a single oversees branch in 1995, but Cher bought it for all the lawyers on her daddy's case

Technologies conspicuously absent from the film:

• Text messages - Oh and Twitter, obvi! Though for effective use of text messaging in film, I recommend Tarantino's "Death Proof."
• GPS - The kids get totally lost trying to make it to the Val party.
• iPhones - See above
• Computers - Surprising. I mean, they existed back then, right?
• DVDs - Christian brings video tapes of Some Like it Hot and "Sporadicus" for his movie night with Cher.
• OMG - Weird, right? Apparently LOL and BRB were in use way back in '89, but OMG was noticeably missing from the Valley Vernacular.